Depressing...
When i had given up someone tell me to hold on. But what can i do if the involved parties choose to do nothing? And if the involved parties choose to ignore it, it could only mean this thing does not matter? Why should i even salvage something that doesn't matter?
Kind of pissed off. Never felt such an anger in my entire life...
Thing that I am unclear of:
1. With Regards to the BLP (b,m,f,h)
h = hierarchy
does this mean:
(since the root must be of higher security level than the parent)
2. For puzzle:
In cases where puzzle could be one big puzzle or could seperate the one big puzzle to 8 smaller sub puzzle.
-Does this mean that: 1 big puzzle = 8 smaller sub puzzle?
The probability of getting them are?
(1/large puzzle) vs (1/smaller puzzle * 8)
In this case in term of working it will be:
FORMULA : m*2k-1 (to find the expected result by brute force)
Hence:
1/2^(k+3)
[Question over here: +3 should be the identifier for the big puzzle to identifier the big puzzle]
1/2^k8
[The k*8 over here is because there is 8 smaller puzzle]
In theory one big puzzle = 8 smaller puzzle
[since the 8 smaller sub puzzle was get by seperating the big puzzle into 8 diff puzzle]
how does:
1/2^(k+3) EQUAL to 1/2^k8? if the +3 refer to the identifier shouldn't the 8 smaller puzzle also have identifier as well?
e.g. 1/2^(8k+3)
sitting down.. realising how immature and childish i was... Clearing my head and most importantly my heart... this moment, i felt a kind of relieve i never had before. As if i am freed from something. Or had gained two wings. Being as immature as i was i am glad tat ppl are willing to go along with me... however yet i know that this was definately not right to continue this way. I am thankful to the gods for helping me.. Heaven had been really kind to me =D If all the gods and mother earth could hear me I would like to thanks them for feeding me, forgiving me, helping me, even though i am so imperfect but yet they never gave me up. For this i am gladful.... and it wasn't a feeling that could be brought out by a single word. Please continue to guide me from now on.. :) I will learn seriously and take every opportunity or experience u gave me
Sometime giving up might not be a bad thing. Life should be live, but not to live for life
A little life was born, the wonderful feeling of being able to experience this life, meeting different kind of person, either good or bad, was all part of a life. Death it might seem faraway but yet near. Death was the end of the experience, the end of a show. Yet an end lead to another is the wonderful start. This cycle that mother nature had create for us. mother nature, something that was so mysterious but yet a part of our life which was essential. Being able to be here, can't felt how lucky i was. Being with the right parent, having a wonderful family. It give me the encouragement to try harder.
I had been trying my best to maintain a certain sort of relationship...
However it's getting difficult, if it continue perhaps i should just give up
Why make life difficult for myself:)
A day with sensei and fujimori san at my parent shop :)
Excessive sake, wine etc...
I shall work hard so can travel again! tat's it!
Yes! Jessica work hard to travel wahaha! tat shall be my motto
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